The Idea
It was the annual kite festival at Bondi Beach. I’d missed it last year, so I couldn’t wait to get there.
The train was completely packed with people squeezed in wherever they could find space. And little kids were carrying their colourful kites, eager to get out and play with them.
The train finally pulled into the station, and I started my walk down to the beach.
After twenty minutes, I came around the final corner and saw the huge crowds.
The beach was absolutely packed with people, many staring up at the sky, eyes filled with child like wonder. I could see a giant octopus with its tentacles floating above them, huge stingrays, a big football, and lots of smaller kites in between. Some were flying so high that they looked like distant tiny planets.
I walked down to the promenade to get a closer look.
And there it was. An enormous black stingray, with googly eyes, and a huge smile that made me immediately happy. Its tail trailed out behind it in long scalloped segments, black fading into teal, into deep purple.
The longer I stared at it, the more I found myself watching the way it moved.
Up.
Down.
Side to side.
Dropping low and then climbing again.
It seemed completely at ease up there. Riding the wind rather than being pushed around by it.
Is this what people mean when they say it’s easier to go with change than to fight against it?
I moved my eyes down from the huge grin on the stingray to one long thin string that disappeared somewhere I couldn’t see.
Of course…it’s tied to something.
And suddenly my grinning stingray, moving graciously in the wind, became less interesting than the string.
The kite wasn’t just riding the waves of the wind. Something was holding firm whilst the conditions of the space around it changed.
It got me thinking.
What is it that keeps us anchored, when everything around us changes?
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The Science
Here’s how a kite in the sky looks weightless.
The wind pushes against it to carry it away. And the string it’s tied to holds it back. It’s this tension that keeps the kite moving in the air instead of being swept away by it.
Held in position and angled in airflow, air moves faster over the top of the kite than underneath it - creating the upward force that’s needed to keep it off the ground and lift it against its own weight.
To remain stable, kites have an angle of attack that’s set by where the string ties into the kite’s frame. If it’s too flat, the kite will struggle to rise, and if it’s too steep it catches too much wind and wobbles,
A small pull on the string changes the angle against the wind.
Keep making small angle adjustments and it stays anchored in changing winds.
It’s this anchor that kept the stingray flying, while hundreds of people stopped to watch it.
It wasn’t graciously moving in the sky because of the conditions. It was graciously moving because of the person on the beach below, adjusting the string each time the wind shifted.
Where It Shows Up
When you’re walking with your umbrella and it’s pulled by strong winds. You move with it, loosen your grip when you need to, and pull it back when it starts to drag you.
When you’re holding the lead of a dog that lunges forward. You tighten it and your hand becomes the tension that stops it from running into the road.
And when you’re putting up a tent on a windy day. It moves with the gusts, but the ropes stay pulled tight with the pegs firmly on the ground. You see the tent move without it being blown away.
The Subtextt
Beneath the feeling of joy from the stingray was the realisation that we should know what keeps us steady through change.
The kite didn’t drift away because it was anchored. Similarly, something has to anchor us when everything is moving faster than we can make sense of. This means making tiny adjustments over and over again, as we go through the moment.
Being steady is therefore about more than just going with the flow.
Its knowing the values that must stay fixed within. It could be honesty, the way we take care of others, or the standards we refuse to lower - even as things around us feel out of control.
Because although the winds may change our circumstances, what they don’t change is what we stand for.
And that wisdom is the only tension worth holding onto.
It’s when our values are compromised, we feel the wobble. If you recognize that, you can get yourself balanced again